There's a Facebook group called "It's a hospital... Not a Hilton." I used to check it with some regularity about a year ago but haven't really kept up with it. The thing is, it's a place for nurses (or other direct patient care personnel) to bitch about the craziest demands they've heard from their patients. I will admit that it's pretty funny and cathartic in a way to be able to vent about being treated poorly by the general public. I don't know of a nurse that hasn't had a patient be overly demanding or rude before, and few nurses that haven't had to deal with a violent patient. It can be mentally taxing enough to take care of those patients who are confused and argumentative because of dementia or delirium, but even more to take care of a patient who is otherwise in his right mind but seems to think that he has been assigned a new slave. However, I think I am over the constant complaining.
When I was in nursing school, I did a group project about Virginia Henderson, one of the historical figures of the nursing profession. We did a little skit in which I actually played Miss Henderson herself, the result of which was that my only real recollection of Miss Henderson's contribution to the nursing profession was her belief that nurses should "do for patients only what they cannot do for themselves" (I believe this was my only line in the skit, repeated ad nauseum). Most of the complaints that nurses seem to have about the expectations of their patients is that patients just expect too much. They are sick (or at least perceive they are); they want to be fed, they want to be bathed, and they want to be waited on. One of my favorite nursing lines is the one that goes something like "at what point in your hernia repair did they break your arms?" Virginia was right, of course; unless you actually did break your arms then you should be able to manage getting that fork to your mouth, and you should do it now because god know I'm not coming home with you. Annoying as this may be, however, this is an opportunity for patient (and family!) education, which is another big part of the role of the nurse.
Then there's the customer service aspect. Every freakin job these days is a customer service job, I don't care what it is you do. I spent many years in menial customer service jobs before I became a nurse, and after a while I learned that it was easier to just give people what they said they wanted (or at least give them the perception that that's what you were doing) than to waste time arguing about it. This made them happy, and got them away from me more quickly. If for some reason this didn't work, the fallback position is to apologize and compromise. All of these things were easier to do once I truly understood that these people did not know me and could therefore not be angry with me personally. In fact, this wasn't really about me at all. I tried to make you happy, really I did; if you are still not happy then you may never be.
So, if you come to my hospital and I am assigned to take care of you, I try to make you happy. If you have completely unreasonable demands then I apologize and try to compromise. I cannot produce miracles; if I could I would just cure you and then we would both be happy. So I do what I can, try to find a creative solution or bend the rules if need be. And if that doesn't work then I try to remember that I tried, that you don't know me, and try not to take it personally. I mean, I can't if I expect to be a nurse for much longer. But seriously, if you do come to my hospital, just be reasonable. It makes my job so much easier.
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